At the outset of your divorce case, unless you have very unusual circumstances, you should let your Albuquerque lawyer know that going to court will be the last resort in deciding your family’s custody arrangement. (However, if you or the child are being abused, involving the court will almost always be required). Though passions run high when it comes to child custody, it’s up to you to set the tone, not your lawyer. Custody negotiations should begin in an even-keeled manner.
From the beginning, ask your attorney to ascertain exactly what the differences are in the custody positions of the parties. Is there an issue over the child’s primary residence? How will visitation be scheduled? Can the child be left with a new girlfriend/boyfriend? With this information in hand, you can begin to formulate a strategy to deal with these issues effectively. If you are close you may be able to negotiate a deal through your lawyers. If you are not so close you might consider using a third party mediator in New Mexico to help. If you are terribly far apart and your spouse is clearly not interested in a child-based resolution, you may need to pursue a path to a final hearing in court.
The tendency to rewrite history in child custody cases
People in the thick of custody negotiations have a tendency to rewrite history. For instance, the primary breadwinner, mother or father, working 80 hours a week, now decides he or she is going to fight for a 50/50 custody arrangement. This person has never in this kid’s life been the main parent, but now is going to pull out all the stops for an equal time. I cannot tell you how many times I have been on the other side of this case in New Mexico. The result? We fight it out until the end and the court awards the exact custody I offered at the beginning of the case, something in the best interest of the child that makes sense considering the lives and responsibilities of the parents.
Be realistic about how much time you will be able to spend with your child once the divorce dust settles. If you have a demanding career, it may be best for the child to enjoy quality weekend visits in Albuquerque with you rather than 50/50 shared custody. It’s ok. You do not have to have 50/50 custody to be a great parent.
If you would like to have your child custody case reviewed so you have some idea what to expect, contact the child custody lawyers who can provide insights based on years of experience and knowledge. The New Mexico Legal Group focuses its practice on divorce law and child custody cases, so all their legal acumen can be brought to bear on your case, and to help you secure a favorable outcome.